January 2011
December 2010
Cinco
The amount of people I have invested all my trust into. Five. I want to thank all of you. You make me feel full when I am empty and give me a swift kick in the ass when I need it. I don’t know what I’d do without any of you. Don’t die okay?
Anonymous asked: Boobs?
Anonymous asked: Boobs?
“Have you ever loved anyone so much you didn’t care what happened to yourself? You just had to be with them. If they look at you, your heart stops. If you feel their breath on your skin, you just ache. Have you ever craved anyone so much you didn’t exist any more?”
“No.”
“I have”.
This movie is absolutely insane. I LOVE IT.
Christmas Eve
with a warm PBR in an empty house.
Sounds depressing right?
I prefer it this way.
Good night.
“All my nightmares escaped my head.
Bar the door, don’t let them in.
You...”
– Radical Face, Welcome Home
Day 30
Your highs and lows of this month.
Well, there were days I neglected to post. There were days I couldn’t post. However, since November 21st, this is what my life has been like.
Lows:
- Got my heart broken.
- Night terrors.
- Lost interest in things I once loved.
- An individual returned to my life that I hate. I’m still trying to take her out in a trash bag.
- Almost lost my...
Day 29
Goals for the next 30 days.
- Spend my money wiser.
- Exercise more.
- Do a least one kind thing a day.
- Stay motivated in doing school work.
- Make the attempt to adjust my sleeping schedule.
I’ve met most of my goals as of recently. It’s an amazing feeling. I want to keep going.
Hope
Today I was acknowledged by a complete stranger for my strife to get an education. He gave me a 100 dollars as a tip for tuition. I was in complete shock. I cried. I have never been so grateful.
This helped restore my faith that there are kind people in this world. People like THIS make me keep my job. People who write me notes or leave me funny things. People like this make me realize that I do...
Day 28
Something you miss.
Sometimes I miss being 15 and completely wreckless (more than I am now). That carefree feeling is one of the best things I’ve ever had. My past is a part of who I am and I have no desire to change it. I miss not having a job, when my life was preoccupied solely by school and good times. Some of those times weren’t the best, but the ones that were contain some of...
Day 27
A problem that you have had.
I’ve had the issue of financial problems lately. Speeding ticket from Oregon, hospital bill, other things that just keep piling up. How do I handle it? I laugh. Situations that I put myself in cost me money. Now all I can do is smile and try to pay shit off.
Day 26
What kind of person attracts you.
Not sure well this is asking about the opposite sex or people in general. Since my mind is a little wrecked right now, I’ll just got with the opposite sex since it’s easier. It’s someone who approaches me directly and doesn’t shy away from me because they’re intimidated. They don’t have to have their arms me all the time and...
Sometimes you're not impressed with the work...
And love isn’t love if you didn’t hurt someone.
Day 25
Someone who fascinates you and why.
This man (Sean Daley) is someone who completely fascinates me. His lyrics are some of the most relatable to me. They’re beautiful and simple. I want to learn from him. I want to learn these experiences or these thoughts in his head where he throws together these songs that I listen to daily. I saw him live and some of the things he said, as simple as...
Day 24
Your favorite movie and what it’s about.
Requiem for a Dream has been my favorite movie since my sophomore year of high school when I first saw it. It’s delves into the lives of four different people with different addictions. They invest in those addictions, and don’t realize that reality will hit them in the face. Not a lot of people like this movie because of how depressing...
Sometimes
I really do ask myself what I would be like if I was cold hearted? If I didn’t care about people or what they felt for me?
It’s not a sympathy post, it’s an actual question. It’s a “what if” scenario. My life would probably be completely different.
I wouldn’t have as many friends or be as well liked as I am now. Is it worth me not feeling the things I...
Truth
I sleep next to women that I don’t deserve.
They try to hurt my pride, while I work their nerves.
Day 23
Give pictures of 5 guys that are famous that you find attractive (for reals?)
Okay well here we go.
Johnny Depp
Jared Leto
Jon Hamm
Sean Daley (Slug)
Johnny Knoxville
Day 22
How have you changed in the past two years?
Let’s see. Two years ago it was December 2008. I was in my senior year of high school, not giving a fuck what anyone thought of me and struttin’ my shit like it was worth something. I was also 17. I still have the same best friends that I do now. I care more about my appearance now than I used to. I used to wear a ponytail and sweats...
Day 21
One of your favorite shows.
Hands down. I’ve loved this show since my sophomore year of high school and I still do. Hugh Laurie is a fantastic actor and incredibly underrated, but I prefer him that way. In a way I can relate to House. I don’t want people to know I care more than I should, so I use sarcastic humor and an asshole demeanor to get by. Each episode leaves me satisfies...
Bottom Line
I was doing a lot of thinking today. And I’ve been looking at my life and the people in it. Most of them are friends, non-blood related people. What’s sad is that I consider myself extremely close with one family member. That’s it. There is not one blood relative who knows everything about me or can even randomly guess my likes and dislikes. My family always felt disconnected. It...
Day 20
How important you think education is.
Honestly with how drained school makes me, it’s very hard to discuss my importance for education. Basically, if you want to get anywhere in life, I guess an education is important. Why? Because these things called careers that you want for yourself actually want you to hit the books and learn something. The end.
Day 19
Disrespecting your parents.
I never got the chance to disrespect my father since he was never around. It was my mother who put up with me being a teenage dirtbag. My mom has always tried to do her best to hold what we have left of a family together. I made that almost impossible. By bringing in all my new discoveries into the household, I disrespected the home she had made by breaking her back at...
Day 18
My Beliefs.
That’s a pretty broad topic there.
As far as religious beliefs go, I really have none. Though I do admire those that are able to have that amount of faith. I believe in the supernatural. Things that go unexplained really do happen. I believe that if something is meant to happen it will happen, no matter what the circumstances. There are some things that are completely...
I'll give you my body
Just sell me your soul.
<3
Day 17
The Highs and Lows of 2010.
Oh 2010, what a rollercoaster you have been (unintentional rhyming).
Highs:
For the most part, I always try to look at everything with a positive. 2010 was another one of those years, but it had way more ups than it did downs. This past year, I was reunited with my father after not talking for six months. I went to Mexico with my little family. Finally got my own car...
